Day 1065: So Sad

Darling A slept until 5:30 this morning.

That would have been awesome.

Unfortunately, Z was up all night barking at the back door.

What?!

Z might not be staying with us much longer.

I wish...

Thanks to her, I lost a total of 2 1/2 hours of sleep last night.  I finally fell back to sleep about 15 minutes before Darling A woke up.

Awesome.

So, I'm a little tired today.  So unusual for me, I know.

And when I'm this tired, sometimes anxiety sets in.  Just a general anxiety.  I start to feel all panicky, but struggle to place what exactly I'm panicked about.  That started this morning.  The good news is, in spite of my exhaustion, I was able to see the anxiety for what it was--just a product of my lack of sleep--and put it to rest.  It tried to pop back up a few times throughout the day, but I just repeated the process.

The other thing going on throughout the day was the decline of Darling A.  She was borderline feverish last night, but then was still so cheerful, we kind of dismissed it.  She still seemed all right this morning. But, after we got home from the morning's outings, she was just so sad.  And then I thought she was going to throw up and that was just so so SO sad.  But, she didn't.  She eventually calmed down and just fell asleep on my shoulder while I was talking to HH about how sad she was.

And then, tonight when I went to put her to bed, she actually did throw up.  We're not talking spit up here, folks.  We're talking the real deal.  We've never had a baby throw up so young and that was so so so so sooooooooooooo sad.  Oh, her cry after was so heartbreaking.  Poor little baby!

Not optimistic about the sleep anyone around here will be getting tonight...