Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Day 1066: Graduating?

Well, Darling A did not sleep well at all.

HH and I tag-teamed it through the night.  She only wanted to sleep while being held.  Oh, she's such a sweetheart and it was so sad.  (In case you didn't pick up on that last night).

Normally, that kind of a night would have been a breaking point for me and I would think, "I can't do this!  I'm not going to be able to survive it!"

But, throughout the night and this morning, I found it pretty easy to remember that this is only temporary.  Chances are, she'll sleep much better tonight because she's so tired and I'll be able to begin catching up my sleep as well.  Plus, I'm only going to be able to snuggle a sick baby for a limited amount of time.  It's just not the same when they get bigger.

So, everything is okay.

So, I had my appointment today.  About halfway through, I began thinking, I've just been talking this whole time about the successes I've had over the past week.  It was more like talking to a friend--granted, a friend who is a really good listener and never has anything to say about themselves--than to a therapist.  He did interject a bit, sometimes to ask how certain things made me feel, but always to tell me he was really impressed with how I handled each situation.

Speaking of, I need to interrupt for a moment and tell you that today I'm feeling a little embarrassed about last Thursday's post.  I still haven't been to see my podiatrist, but I'm sure I totally overreacted and that everything is not nearly so serious.

And even if it is, I am coming to peace with various reasons why it can be okay if running is no longer a part of my future.  Although, this afternoon and evening my foot has finally started feeling better.  I think all of the swelling is gone, and there have been moments where it hasn't been hurting at all!  So, maybe I just needed to freak out a bit.

Anyway, back to my appointment--he began to give me a homework assignment for the upcoming week (writing down all of the things I've gained through my experience with depression), but I had to tell him that, actually, I'd already done that.  And then there was no follow up homework assignment to that.

In fact, he told me that he thought it was time to start phasing out the therapy sessions.

And now I'm struggling to put into words how that made me feel.

To put it really simply, let's just say, happy.

And then we scheduled my next appointment for next year.  Yeah.  You read that right.  I'm just a little apprehensive because the next few weeks have all kind of crazy busyness and potential for stress (and we've got way more than Christmas going on, here).  But, I think I'll be alright.

Here's to finishing the year strong and happy and at peace.

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